Birthdays

Another written last fall....



Today is my friend's birthday and it's made me think about birthdays.

When we were kids we couldn't wait for the next one...waiting to turn 5 so we could go to kindergarten, to turn 13 so we'd be real teen-agers, 16 to get our driver's license, 18 to be an official adult and 21 to legally purchase our first drink.

After that we didn't wish them to come around so fast. Some years we even dreaded them. "Oh, my God! I'm 30!" "I can't be 40 already!" "50, you mean I'm a half a century old?" "Where in the world did the time go? I'm 60!"

The birthday that made me feel OLD was my 35th. I went to school and was greeted by a fellow teacher. She said, "Guess what, now you are as close to 50 as you are to 20!" The next birthday that made me feel old wasn't mine. It was when my older daughter turned 20. How could I have a child who was 20 years old, when I didn't feel much older than that myself?

Some years birthdays have been big celebrations. My daughter and my husband planned a surprise party for my 50th. It was fun and I was surprised. I was amazed at all the planning and organizing they had done without my knowledge. It was a fun night and helped ease the pains of officially entering into the senior citizen realm.

Other years the day passes without much notice, no cake, no candles, no gifts. Just a day to reflect and wonder how another year has passed so quickly.

As I have gotten older, I especially appreciate the well wishes of long time friends. It's nice to know that they remembered me and took time from their day to let me know. Each year I write friends and family members names on the calendar and have great intentions to send cards or call each of them. Some years I do a miserable job and hope my friends know that I did think about them, even if I forgot to send a card.

All birthday's should be special, we all deserve at least one day a year in the spotlight. A day to do exactly what we want to do...sleep late, eat chocolate, walk on the beach, do nothing that even approaches work. A day when friends and family send greetings and let us know they are thinking about us. A day when worries are not allowed to cross our minds.

Happy Birthday! May we celebrate many, many more birthdays together.

Remembering Alex

Found another that I hadn't posted...written sometime during the past year.


"Ah, Mom, you know you want a dog." both daughters were trying to persuade me to say yes to the cute little Lhasa Apso puppy.

Several weeks earlier our friends Lhasa had given birth to puppies. I think there were 6. I had seen them soon after they were born and they were adorable. Susan, the dog's "mother" had sold all but one puppy and she really wanted us to take the last one. She only wanted her puppies to go to people she knew. But, I am not an animal person. I am allergic to cats. The only pets I've had success with are fish. Jennifer had childhood allergies so a dog had been out of the question. Up until now the kids had been happy with the fish and hamsters. But we had moved to a house with very little carpeting and a large fenced in backyard and Susan was asking us to take "Goat".

I'm not sure why they were calling him Goat; he was cute. He was the runt of the litter, a little brown fur ball. How could I say no.

We brought Goat home and changed his name to Alexander the Goat and immediately began calling him Alex. The kids played with him and took care of him and tried unsuccessfully to keep him from chewing up the furniture. He really was hardly any trouble and neither Jennifer nor I had any allergy problems from having him around.

Alex quickly became a part of the family. I don't think he ever realized he was a dog. He was part of the family. We installed a doggie door so he could come and go on his own. We established self feeding and he was great, he didn't over eat and seemed to be in great health.

One summer we decided to take a summer vacation. Alex would not be allowed to go with us, so we did the normal thing. We took him to the kennel. When we went back to get him at the end of the week, they told us never to bring him back. Evidently he stayed in the back corner of his cage and shook for a week. The next time we needed to leave him we asked a co-workers son to come and stay with him. Three days into the trip Mark called and said, "Alex has not eaten since you left." We figured there wasn't much we could do from out of state and told Mark we guessed he'd eat when he got hungry. Alex was glad to see us when we got home, he was thinner but in good shape.

It took us a while, but we finally learned that Alex didn't want to go to the kennel, nor did he want anyone else staying in "his" house. So, for any other weekends away or family vacations, Alex stayed by himself and we had a neighbor come in daily to check on him and make sure he had food and water. Alex was much happier with this arrangement.

The years past, the girls grew up and left for college, Alex stayed with us. He was aging, seemed to be losing his hearing, had some vision problems, and had a little trouble jumping down from furniture but nothing major.

I came home from work one day and could not find Alex. I was sure he had crawled under a bed or outside under a bush and quietly died. I searched frantically, no Alex. The back gate was open, someone had been in the yard a left the gate open. Where in the world had Alex gone. He had hardly ever been out of the yard. He didn't like to ride in cars so we didn't take him out except to the vet or the groomer. He walked with me to the mailbox but that was the extent of his world outside the backyard.

David came home and he called several neighbors but no one had seen Alex. The next morning we called the local radio station and sure enough a lady several streets over and across a very busy street had Alex. She and her husband had seen him and since they, too, had a Lhasa they decided to take him in for the evening. So Alex returned home. To this day I cannot figure out how Alex managed to get across that street.

More years passed, we decided to sell our house in Kentucky and retire in Florida. Alex was more than 15 years old. What should we do? Jennifer had 2 dogs of her own but was willing to let Alex come and live with her. But would that be good for Alex? A strange new house, strange dogs to share his life with? Clare had just graduated from college and was in an apartment so she couldn't take him. Should we take him to Florida? At least he would be with us and our routine would be similar. We took him to the vet to make sure his shots were up-to-date and discussed what would best. I remember thinking the vet might suggest it was time to "put Alex down". But the vet said he thought Alex would be fine in Florida.

We purchased a crate, and got the sedatives that the vet had prescribed. David would be driving the truck and I would drive my Highlander filled with assorted clothing, househould items and Alex the 600 miles to Florida. I wanted to start the trip without sedating Alex. After all he hadn't traveled before maybe he'd do fine. Twenty-five miles down the road we stopped at the first rest stop and gave him the pills, he had howled the entire time I had been driving.

Alex adjusted pretty well to Florida. There were steps, lots of steps in the new house but he did just fine. He lost his freedom because the yard was not fenced, but seemed fine to stay in the house or go out when we took him out. So we all adjusted to our new life.

About a year passed and we decided to go to visit Clare who was now in Chicago. Jennifer agreed to keep Alex, so we went to her house first and dropped him off. It had been a while since she had seen Alex. She commented on how old he seemed. A few days later when we returned to pick him up, Jennifer said she had discussed Alex with her mother-in-law, who had raised and trained dogs for many years. Then Jennifer said she thought it was time to put Alex down and even suggested we go to her vet. The vet had just put Bailey down, Jennifer's hyperacted, adorable Brussels Griffon. Bailey had fought a long hard fight with cancer but had recently lost his battle.

I knew that Alex's quality of life was not what it once was, but to put him down. How could I do that? Nearly seventeen years ago I had not wanted to bring this little, brown fur ball home with me. I was not going to be the one to take care of this puppy, but somehow I was the one who had gotten attached. Now I was the one who was going to take him on one last journey.

Jennifer called and made the arrangements. The next morning David and I put Alex in the car and drove the few miles to the vet. David said he would not go back into the room with Alex. I could not let Alex go alone, so I went back with him. The vet and the assistant came to get him. They would give him a sedative and bring him back to me. They were gone for a while. When they brought Alex back in his eyes were open but he was limp. I remember thinking he was gone, but the vet then gave him a shot and it was over. Alex was gone.

It's been about 4 years since Alex, I still think of him. I often see his face when I look at other dogs. I will never own another dog, but I am glad that I let Susan, David and the kids talk me into bringing Alex into my life.

The Music In Me

Another entry that I have had in storage and decided to get them out and post them here...there are more to come.


Music has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I guess my earliest memory of music is listening to a radio program on Saturday mornings when I was a young child. The theme song to that program was "The Teddybear's Picnic". And there was always music at Sunday School like "This Little Light of Mine" and "Jesus Loves the Little Children".

I started taking piano lessons when I was in the second grade. I was never very good because I didn't like to practice. I just wanted to sit down and play, but unfortuately I was not gifted with the ability to play by ear. In fourth grade I played the tonette, a sort of recorder. The tonette band was a requirement for getting to play an instrument the next year.

My band director decided I should play the violin. I hated it! I was terrible, but I stuck it out for one year so I could play the flute. I liked the flute but, like my piano lessons, I didn't like to practice. I continued to play flute just well enough to be able to march in the marching band in high school. I loved the marching band, it was a lot of work but when the band took the field at pre-game and half time Wow! what a feeling! And that uniform, as ugly as it was, I loved it! Unlike high school bands today we learned a new show each week, we practiced before school, after school, a few nights a week and on school holidays. And I loved it!

I have always liked to have music on in the background of my life. I don't think I could drive without the radio on. I have recorded some of my favorite music so I can listen to it on my iPod when I walk and I often have music on when I am at home. I remember my mother always listened to WIKY as she did her housework. I didn't like "her music" it was too old-fashioned but it was there.

There aren't too many kinds of music I don't like. My favorite music has to be the music of my youth. The music of the 60's and early 70's, I don't think there is any better music. I've always liked classical music, and have learned to like Bluegrass and Big Band music. I enjoy music from other cultures, especially if it includes a steel drum.

It's funny how a few songs can transport you back across time and space. There are three such songs in my life. No matter where I am or what I'm doing when I hear these songs, my memories take over and transport me to another place and time for a few minutes.

One such song is "My Girl" by the Temptations. Whenever I hear it I am immediately riding in Eddie's blue convertible listening to the song on the 8 track player. Eddie was my "bestest" buddy in middle and high school. We spent a lot of time driving in his car and listening to music. I'm not sure why one particular song stands out, but it sure does. When it comes on I can feel the cool night air blowing my hair.

Another song that takes me away is "Cherish" by The Association. When I hear this song I am sitting the the Pizza Barn in Terre Haute, Indiana. I am a freshman in college and I am on a date. This date was arranged by a high school friend. The guy I am with is very nice, but I had a boy friend "back home". When "Cherish" came on I knew that I was "in love" with the guy back home and started making plans to go back home to attend a local campus and be near him. (By the way, that was a big mistake and the guy back home was not the love of my life.)

A third song that takes me away and caused me to make a life changing decision is "You are not Alone" by Michael Jackson. I was working in Frankfort and stayed away from home most of the week. I had just returned from a week of vacation with my family and my boss said she needed me to drive to northern Kentucky to help with a training session. I chose to drive the back roads and of course the radio was on. When Michael started to sing, I started to cry. What was I doing in northern Kentucky while my husband and daughters were in western Kentucky? Why had I taken this job that required me to be alone? I decided to start looking for a job that would allow me to be closer to home.

For the last several months I've been listening to music and much more I've been hearing the lyrics. I am amazed that all these years I've enjoyed the songs and thought I knew them, but I didn't. Some of the lyrics are wonderful and others are a bit strange. There are lyrics that I can't believe I allowed my own daughters to listen to in the 80s and lyrics that tell such wonderful stories.

I can't even imagine what it must be like for composers to have all that music in their heads and to be able write it down, what a feeling that must be. All I can say is thank you...thank you to the composers for the music, the lyricists for the stories, to the performers for sharing the music with us and to the folks who have figured out how to record the music for us to enjoy anytime we want to hear it.

And yes, there has been music on in the background as I have been writing this...I have the TV on the Flashback 70s music station...there has been a little Chicago, a dash of Firefall, a bit of Rolling Stones and some George Harrison.


It's been way too long since I wrote. It won't happen again.

Movies, Movies, Movies

I haven't put anything here in a long, long, long time. That doesn't mean I haven't written. I have, it was just saved elsewhere...here is a piece I wrote sometime during the past year...


I am not a movie buff, don't care for the Hollywood scene, almost never go to the theatre, could careless who wins an Academy Award (although I do like to see the clothes on Oscar night). My last trip to a theatre was to take my grandchildren to see Despicable Me. It turned out to be a cute movie.

When I was growing up kids went to the movies on Saturday afternoon for the double feature. Sometimes my family would go to the drive-in on Friday or Saturday night. During that time I was "into" science fiction movies and comedies. About the only one I remember is The Blob. It was pretty scary when the blob came out of the projection room into the theatre.

In middle and high school I still went to the movies, the time just moved to Friday and Saturday night and often to the drive-in theaters. And I'm sure there was more talking and kissing than actually watching the movies.

For some reason on a recent morning walk I found myself thinking about movies. I made a mental list of all time favorites...these are not in a Top 10 order, just movies that spoke to me, made me laugh, made me cry or the music got into my head and stayed for days. These are movies I can watch over and over and over again.

A couple of movies stand out in my mind because of the cast. I think whoever cast George Clooney and Tim Blake Nelson in O' Brother Where Are Thou? is an absolute genius! They are fantastic in their rolls. I also love the music in that movie. This is one movie that I purchased first in VHS format, then on DVD, the CD of the music and a CD of a concert that was a follow-up to the movie.

Another movie that I love because the cast is great is The Birdcage. Of course Robin Williams and Nathan Lane are fantastic, but in my opinion Hank Azaria stole the show and should have gotten an Academy Award. That movie makes me laugh every time I watch it. That dinner scene is hysterical.

Dan in Real Life is a recent favorite of mine. The music is simple and wonderful. The best part of this movie is the dialogue between Dan and Marie that takes place without words. Steve Carrell and Juliette Binoche convey so much through their eyes and body language.

My two favorite "chick flicks" would have to be The Bridges of Madison County and An Officer and a Gentleman. When Richard Gere walks into that factory and carries Debra Winger out the door and the passionate weekend between Merle Streep and Clint Eastwood...hand me the tissues!

My grandchildren have introduced me to a great movie...Wall-e. It, too, has music that sticks in my head and wonderful dialogue between Wall-e and Eve that take place through their eyes and body language...and these two characters are robots. I know there's another whole level to the movie about ruining our environment but I like the romantic part better.

My list of black and white favorites would include: To Kill a Mockingbird, Arsenic and Old Lace, and Psycho. Who wouldn't want Atticus Finch to be their dad or at least to grow up on that street and play with Scout and Jem? And the two, little old ladies who poison their house guests how funny was that? Psycho has to be one of the scariest movies of all time, I often think of that shower scene when I am in a hotel room alone.

How to Murder Your Wife...I have no idea why but this movie has always been one of my favorites. Yes, it has catchy music and yes, it has romance and again there is dialogue without many words because Jack Lemmon and Virna Lisi don't speak the same language.

Another movie from the '60s on my list would have to be High Time. It has Bing Crosby as a 50 something year old man going back to finish his college degree. He joins a fraternity, studies, falls in love with his French professor and doesn't let his snobby, rude children spoil his plans.

I don't usually like movies with "X-rated" language but I have to admit the language added a lot to Ladykillers. I went to the movie because it had Tom Hanks in it and he was one of my favorite actors, (his recent political activity has caused me to rethink my feelings about him). However, he was not so good in this movie. What Tom lacked the others made up for...this is one of the most hilarious movies I have ever seen. I actually went to the theatre twice to see it and then bought the DVD.

The list can't end without Legally Blonde and French Kiss. Reese Witherspoon and Meg Ryan are "way high" on my list of great actresses. I like Legally Blonde because she tells that jerk boyfriend where to get off in the end. I applaud the author for not have Elle take him back! And French Kiss is great because Kevin Kline is such a funny, believable French man...and because of the romance.

I'm sure I'll think up more...but hand me the popcorn I think it's time to push the "play" button.